The gentleman who is self-actualized truly understands the difficulty of being a gentleman. We run into issues were we know for a fact that there are moments where it might hinder the advancement of the situation that we might be in. The fact is, the point of life is to get to that point, and begin to change the world in making the life of a gentleman easier. You’ll often interact with people who have no understanding of Maslow’s hierarchy of Needs and will not understand this first journey of life. A gentleman might not be at that high point of self actualization, but they are definitely on the path to that outcome as they work on bettering themselves. This is a sure sign that they will be accept the facts of where they came from, not be angry at their flaws and move forward.

Money is something that we must have to survive. Without it we cannot accomplish the very first step of the hierarchy of needs. Understanding that life can be enjoyed without the use of money is one of the hardest steps to accomplish in life. Obtaining income is the most useful step for preservation of life and increases the possibility of reproduction. Even if our goal in life is not to bring someone else into the world, our main goal is only self preservation. Without financial responsibility it becomes increasingly difficult to become stable at a later time in our lives.

Living life through inanimate objects is where people in my age range have the most trouble. We have expensive habits and a failing economy to deal with simultaneously. Most of us feel at a loss if we are not the owner of what is hot or new, and it is socially personified through our personality. When it comes to the simple needs in life, we also focus on obtaining the objects that have a higher status then what may be below it. Things like clothing and cars, are something a gentleman needs to make sure is not over-showing their income level. It may appear, or they may say that they are into this for their own happiness, but just like bodybuilding; these things were pressed on to you through a society that is directly influenced by marketing and media.

This indirectly helps the mental understanding of the gentleman. The hard work of mental stability is never conversed with whomever the gent is interacting with, but through this growth he is accepted at a higher level than average individuals.

The traditional thought of what to do for this day was passed down to me for the first time this year. On this day you are suppose to act and work on how you will be for the rest of the year. So if you work today, the thought is that you’ll work for the rest of the year. If you work out today, you’ll go to the gym every day for the year. If you’re mentally happy, well you get the point.
Get out there and do the things you want to do this year. Spend less, meet people, sit up straight, live life or just smile are all things you can do today. Try and at least make today a joyful one.

GwR

She’s gorgeous and sitting at the bar facing out with a drink in hand. All the guys look at her as she smiles and has her girlfriends on either side of her. They talk here and there but don’t say much due to the loud noise of the club. She notices all the guys checking her out, but doesn’t take interest in any of them. She humbly waits for someone to talk to her that she has hopes to be good looking and interesting.

He’s standing with a group of his friends next to the dance floor not too far from our girl at the bar. His good looks capture the glances of girls in the room. He’s been getting it for so long that he doesn’t even notice it happening. All of his ex’s have approached him in the past and he hasn’t had the need to work hard to meet anyone in his life. They approach him.

They do happen to notice each other. They keep exchanging glances waiting for either to make the approach. Fifteen minutes go by and the looks become more frequent but still nothing happens. Our girl’s friends notice her and make it more obvious for him to make the approach. His guy friends talk about how awesome he is that a hot girl is checking him out. An hour goes by and they pass each other without saying one word.

These ten’s will never truly meet because of blatant stupidity. Our guy doesn’t want to do the work and is being blocked by his fear, although he will deny it. The girl won’t make the approach because she plays by the rules. Plus she gets approached over five times a day so to ask her to approach him is completely absurd. Sadly they leave the club with someone else who approaches them both even though they both knew who they wanted to leave with.

It’s 2008 and, we the gentlemen of the world know, the times have changed. If are going to debate if we pay the bill on a date, if we are going to debate if women and men are to be paid equally in an office, if we are to debate if the women and men have a specific role at home; we say we should be equal. So in this one case, in this one situation in life, I’d black card both of them. This would probably be the one time I’d get mad at a girl for not doing something about it. You both can face rejection, but until you actually get rejected or accepted, you’ll just be a failure. We’ve all been here. I debate creating a specific page of men who never approached girls even though she gave him all the signs in the world for him to say hello. Just make the approach or you’ll just be some guy/girl who settled on something that came to you.

GwR

Young man, your posture is terrible. You’re leaning over because you spend 10 hours minimum a day looking at your computer. Sure you have a bouncy-ball for a seat at work, but all it’s really doing is working out your obliques for stabilization and keeping your spine at what one might assume is the natural position of the spine. I won’t get into our origin and how our spine has evolved and still has some evolving to do. Instead I’m going to get into how to keep your back straight without you constantly thinking about it.

No way, I’m not doing it.

That’s usually the first thing I hear when I present this to people. It’s sad really that they don’t want to do it, but I know it will help. Do back workouts like Shrugs, dead-lifts, Romanian dead-lifts, rows, etc. Chest workouts as well, incline, decline, straight bench. These are all things that will structurally change the position of your bones as well as strengthen your joints and muscles. Sitting in a chair is completely terrible for your back. People fail to realize this, and then when they go to a gym for their first personal training session, they have a horrible time on abdominal workouts. Guess what else helps your posture? That’s correct; Abdominal workouts.

Hunchback vs. Ahhnold

The very first thing almost everyone I know tells me about lifting weights is that they don’t want to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger from Pumping Iron. They say they “blow up” when they lift weights. First I’m going to tell you that lifting weights will never equal you looking like that unless you have god, steroids, and twenty-seven metric tons of chicken lying around for you to use/consume. It will never happen. Even if you try, it will take, at the minimum, ten dedicated years. So you decide not to lift weights and decide to do this on a conscious level. Your battle with this is not just with your body but with how we were originally intended to be: All four limbs on the ground. Two-thousand years from now, it might be your thought process on this that makes everyone perfectly postured. On the flipside, this is your life, and when you’re one-hundred years old, you’re going to want to live in a bell tower because your upper back will be above the top of your head. Who wants that?

Friend Correction

One of my cousins, bless that girl, would always grab my shoulders, hands over the top, thumb deep into the shoulder blade, and turn back to correct my posture. I have a habit of letting my stress ride in my shoulders like the good and bad angels we all carry. A good Yoga-session with one of my girlfriends is now what I use to wash it away. If you don’t have friends that have great posture (watch the people in your life today and see who does and doesn’t) you’re going to have to correct yourself. Have a tall mirror in your living place that you will pass at least once daily. On the mirror have the word “posture” on it to remind you of it. And check your stance in the mirror. We’ll have another post in the future to cover how the different workouts correct the posture in different ways.

GwR

I thought today’s write up could be over the updates to the site. Within this week I will be ordering the business cards to go out to the world. Soon the men of the world should have a small, cool, new reason to fear women. The black and white cards of this site will feature our G logo and the URL for the website. The women who will be able to hand out the cards will be assigned a number so that it can be tracked. Once a card is handed to a gentleman, the liaison should contact me with the cause of the hand out so that I can write it up for everyone to see. My hope is to also receive pictures when the cause of the hand out is something we can all blatantly see. I hope to have them complete and sent over to the print house tonight, pending the software issues I’m currently going through right now. Hopefully tomorrow you’ll see pictures of what the cards look like and when to expect them. That’s all for now!

GwR

Young sir I hope you have some self respect. Don’t deter your life with an abundant amount of it for the reason that it will be perceived by the outside as egocentrism. Don’t have to little or none of it, because then people will find you to be a black hole of downer-ism. Having trouble riding this wave? Let’s talk about the two areas, how to solve it and then check out the hook while my DJ spins it.

OD’ed on Self Respect

Keep yourself in check. No one is perfect, and if you bask in your awesomeness you’ll only end up being hated by people. When you receive compliments show gratitude and delete it from your head. Feeding off of this for self love is a one-way-ticket to assholeville. It is hard to notice when you have climbed your own pedestal. The best way to take a step back is to remember your flaws. We all have them. If I find myself quite happy about where I am, I knock back by writing down my flaws. I’ll share some with you to help out how to check yourself before you wreck your vehicle.

1. Shut up, you tell too many stories. Spend more time listening.
2. You’re not a 10/10. You’re bald, have a 20% body fat ratio, and have a crooked nose.
3. You forgot your collar stays this morning. Way to be clean cut.
4. Your breakfast had cheese and a little potato in it. Welcome to Failureville, Population you.

I seriously could go on, but you get the point. Everyone is flawed. I think it’s what makes us beautiful in this world. It’s our flaws that separate us from the animals. Without them we could not aspire to be bigger and better. Remembering your flaws helps you become indestructible and humble at the same time.

Oh Lord, why let me keep breathing

Get out of bed, brush your teeth and go for a freaking run. Sure you have flaws, but swimming in them only keeps you underwater and invisible to what’s around you. You must wake up and realize that we all wear them. It’s what we do with them in our lives to help move forward. Sure you were dating Jessica Alba and she dumped you for your best friend. Guess what. There are six billion people in the world and those were just two people. Your only flaw was to surround yourself with people who would do those actions to you. So now you can wake up and go find people that wouldn’t dare do something like that to you. If the situation that brought you down was so destructionably-devastating that you haven’t left your bed, I’ll only give you half of a day at most. After that, as your friend, I’d black-card you for wasting human life. We need you out there to fight the good fight for the gentleman world.

Where am I today?

I have great days, where I wake up at 5:00am on the dot and on fire for the gym. I have days where I want to call in sick and not leave my bed unless I have to go to the bathroom. Even that would be questionable, but I don’t want to ruin my mattress. It’s quite comfortable. That’s not the point. The point is to find out where you are and adjust to that perfect equilibrium. Catching yourself is the hardest part, but when you do, you’ll love it and be on a fast track to become a role model in the Gentleman world.

GwR

It’s a dead art really. Being a gentleman. Women have lost the touch of appreciating it. As much as we have a certain level of asshole in our personality, holding the door open for girls won’t get us anywhere. You should just know that holding the door open for anyone won’t be received as extraordinary or cause an influx of positivity in your social worth. If someone were to get a black card for not holding a door open, it should be for the reason that they were on a date. In all cases, women of today want to be our equal. So let’s take that into account.

Now we come to the topic of why on earth we would still go to the time to waste a few seconds to hold the door open for someone. I do it to show that the gentleman is still alive. We’re still here and thriving, just smaller in numbers and dwindling. When going through the process of opening the door for someone or a few people coming into a building, I will first enter and then hold the door open with my foot and make sure to hold eye contact for the next person to come into the building effortlessly due to my actions. I make sure that they recognize the fact that I’m there and willing to do so. I know deep down that every time I do it, it’s not received, recognized or added to my social value. I do know that if it is to happen to someone on more than one occasion and with everyone I know, it is received. If you have friends that are girls, and you go to the effort to always make sure that you are the individual that does this, it will be added to your social value through them. I shouldn’t have to explain that your social value is increased by the number of women behind you that support who you are as an individual.

Holding the door open isn’t the only small thing an individual can do. There are a ton of other small things out there that a gentleman can do that isn’t really received these days. One must remember that having these small attributes as a personality trait will not cause any negative perceptions of them. So remember it’s about maintaining that persona, and not letting it die, even if it’s not received or added to who you are. Even if the women aren’t watching you. We are, and we love you for it.

GwR

Yes a mind is a terrible thing to waste. We all know that. What I want to convey, on the other hand, is that it’s easier to say no, or sit and do nothing then it is to feed the mind. Learning a new language, reading a newspaper or book is what some people find a daunting task. The only problem an individual might face is that if they continue on the path of least mind growth, they will stay on that path due the human mind having a deep desire for patterns and repetition.

Breaking a bad habit, like watching TV the moment you get home, is extremely difficult to break. Your mind is mistaken by the force of useless information of the television as an interaction. The addition will continue to grow as you are focused on it, like hypnosis. The first step to breaking the habit is to stop from actually doing it. Cold turkey if you will.

The reasoning behind feeding one’s mind is also how we interact with the world. If there’s a discussion over an author, you’ll have trouble interjecting or being a part of the situation if you haven’t fed you mind to an equal extent on the topic.

I have been lacking on this topic, and have recently decided to open the books that I have had trouble with in the past. Not only because they are not as entertaining as a Dean Koontz book, but also because it’s educational. Somehow through our schooling and lifestyle, we tend to fight education. We must learn to accept that it is in our best interest to actually learn and grow one’s mind. I’m going to try and ban myself from watching movies at home, and staying off of things like the internet for useless stimulation for as long as possible. I’ll consider this day one. I’ll write here when I break my stimulation and end up watching/surfing. Any bets on how long I’ll last?

I had a crappy year. I get them every now and then. The vibe for 2009 feels quite wonderful on the other hand, and I feel this overpowering sensation that all my woes and fears about life will wash away leaving me room to only shine.

Just like a Monday is a fresh start for a new beginning, so is the new year. We can all have those resolutions to better ourselves, or we can just use it to wash out what we have for our residual self image. We can wash it clean through our own personal cleanse.

Leftovers from a Previous Life

Oh the woes of what our forefathers gave us. I’m predisposed of all my fat going to my stomach which is completely unattractive and unavoidably hard to hide. That’s not the leftovers I’m talking about. I’m talking about deeds we’ve given ourselves in our previous years that trickle into this one. You can’t burden yourself with them and give up on a fresh new year. I for one have about seven traffic & parking violations to pay for. (Ouch.)

We should place these leftovers as a priority to overcome for the year. Be it small or large; make it the first point to conquer. It may seem odd, but that weight on your back will dig holes and slow your personal growth as an individual, which is something I wish upon no one. For the most part, the burdens from our past should be able to be overcome fast and swiftly through actions we may have set aside due to being overcome with fear. Don’t let that be! We gents can stand strong in 2009!

GwR

Lucky for us we have a brain to come up with words that can slay an enemy, or woo a girl. Some of us don’t have that capability, or assume we don’t and feel terrible for it. I’m here to tell you that everyone has the chance to come up with something witty for almost anything. It’s not that hard really, and after you delve into this over time you’ll come to realize it. Let’s get you started into the world of the witty response.

Can it

First up on the list of becoming one with words is not speaking just yet. Say it in your head first. I have a big heart for this topic, because if you speak before you think, you have a far greater chance of saying something completely moronic. I have to tell myself to think before I speak every morning. So the first step. Think of what you’re going to say, then say it. Not that hard right?

I’m Ready for Your Answer

While you are running the sentence through your head, for that split second you must think of what the person you are talking to will respond with. Let’s give you a simple example:

Gent: Have you seen Josh today?

Recipient’s answer one: Yes.

Recipient’s answer Two: No.

The thought process for a closed question like above will give you the smallest possible answers one can respond with. There’s just two, and you can usually come up with a response almost immediately because you thought of the answers before they said one. You most likely do this on a sub-conscious level. Now if you take this on a conscious level, you can be extravagant with your answer on a question that has many possible answers.

Material Gent, in a Material World

When we watch movies or TV show’s we often see people doing/saying something in response to whomever they are talking to with something that blows you away. Be it a magic trick, or a wise joke that makes (most likely a girl) the recipient stand in shock and awe. The key here is that they asked that question before, maybe even hundreds of times. This is why women are on a higher social scale then most men. I’ll give you an example:

Gent: How are you today?

Girl: Worse, now that you’ve said hello.

Ouch. Guess what. It wasn’t the gent’s fault for asking that question. It was the girl’s response because she’s been asked that before. Quite a few times actually. If you get asked the same question over and over, you’ll have a response like the one above to shut the next person up. They were not expecting that.

The Key to this part is asking something witty that will have a high possibility of answers but on average only get’s one or two. I ask you to task yourself with having a question that is unusual, and asking it to at a minimum of five people. Keep your mind prepared to remember every answer and build a response for each one.

Gent: “What’s better: Robertson’s Drive or Rodeo Drive?”

High possibility One:

Girl: “Oh Em Gee, Robertson’s Drive.”

Gent: “Why? Because Paris Hilton Shop’s there? Or are the stores better?”

High possibility Two:

Girl: “Oh Em Gee, Rodeo Drive.”

Gent: “I feel the legend it is built up to be is less then what one experiences. Why Rodeo? ”

If you went out and asked this question to more than five girls, I can almost guarantee after five girls you’ll run into a response you’ve already heard. Now you can come up with something witty. You can come up with a response for Robertson that’s better than mine, maybe something about Kitson. Who knows what your brilliance can come up with over time. Now you too can be one of the witty ones in society.

GwR