Lucky for us we have a brain to come up with words that can slay an enemy, or woo a girl. Some of us don’t have that capability, or assume we don’t and feel terrible for it. I’m here to tell you that everyone has the chance to come up with something witty for almost anything. It’s not that hard really, and after you delve into this over time you’ll come to realize it. Let’s get you started into the world of the witty response.

Can it

First up on the list of becoming one with words is not speaking just yet. Say it in your head first. I have a big heart for this topic, because if you speak before you think, you have a far greater chance of saying something completely moronic. I have to tell myself to think before I speak every morning. So the first step. Think of what you’re going to say, then say it. Not that hard right?

I’m Ready for Your Answer

While you are running the sentence through your head, for that split second you must think of what the person you are talking to will respond with. Let’s give you a simple example:

Gent: Have you seen Josh today?

Recipient’s answer one: Yes.

Recipient’s answer Two: No.

The thought process for a closed question like above will give you the smallest possible answers one can respond with. There’s just two, and you can usually come up with a response almost immediately because you thought of the answers before they said one. You most likely do this on a sub-conscious level. Now if you take this on a conscious level, you can be extravagant with your answer on a question that has many possible answers.

Material Gent, in a Material World

When we watch movies or TV show’s we often see people doing/saying something in response to whomever they are talking to with something that blows you away. Be it a magic trick, or a wise joke that makes (most likely a girl) the recipient stand in shock and awe. The key here is that they asked that question before, maybe even hundreds of times. This is why women are on a higher social scale then most men. I’ll give you an example:

Gent: How are you today?

Girl: Worse, now that you’ve said hello.

Ouch. Guess what. It wasn’t the gent’s fault for asking that question. It was the girl’s response because she’s been asked that before. Quite a few times actually. If you get asked the same question over and over, you’ll have a response like the one above to shut the next person up. They were not expecting that.

The Key to this part is asking something witty that will have a high possibility of answers but on average only get’s one or two. I ask you to task yourself with having a question that is unusual, and asking it to at a minimum of five people. Keep your mind prepared to remember every answer and build a response for each one.

Gent: “What’s better: Robertson’s Drive or Rodeo Drive?”

High possibility One:

Girl: “Oh Em Gee, Robertson’s Drive.”

Gent: “Why? Because Paris Hilton Shop’s there? Or are the stores better?”

High possibility Two:

Girl: “Oh Em Gee, Rodeo Drive.”

Gent: “I feel the legend it is built up to be is less then what one experiences. Why Rodeo? ”

If you went out and asked this question to more than five girls, I can almost guarantee after five girls you’ll run into a response you’ve already heard. Now you can come up with something witty. You can come up with a response for Robertson that’s better than mine, maybe something about Kitson. Who knows what your brilliance can come up with over time. Now you too can be one of the witty ones in society.

GwR